Valentines Day is one of my favorite holidays. One of the reasons for this is that Valentines Day, February 14th, is also my wife’s birthday AND our anniversary is the day before, February 13th. We were married 36 years ago on Friday the 13th – despite the reputation this day incurs, it turned out to be a fine and memorable day for me! Add to this the fact that our middle son’s birthday is two days later and my mother-in-law’s birthday is on our anniversary, and it is a bit of a busy week!
I believe we men and husbands need to work harder at making such holidays (and personal events such as our anniversaries) special for our wives; doubly so if you are blessed as I was with not only marrying the one and only love of your life but also a Proverbs 31 wife. (Ladies, if you are unsure of what this looks like just observe my wife. She fits the description exactly, and I mean exactly, and I am so thankful for every moment God has given us and I look forward to our next 36 years together).
A good wife is the crown of her husband… Prov 12:4 (RSV)
A good wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. Prov 31:10 (RSV)
I have know men many many times more successful than I am. They can afford their nice houses, cars, boats, and toys toys toys… But many if not most of them are miserable in life. I have often wondered why this is. The simple fact of the matter is they lack treasure where it really counts.
In many cases, their jobs, toys and lifestyles somewhere along the line became their treasure, and that is where their hearts dwell as well. Scripture, however, helps us identify where our hearts are to be focused. First and foremost, Matthew 6:33 teaches us that if we place God first ‘all these things will be added to you.”
But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things shall be yours as well.
Matt 6:33 (RSV)
Once a husband has this priority right, they will then and only then be able to recognize that their true treasure on this earth is the wife God has given them (Prov 31:10).
Sometimes economic hardship can be a blessing. I learned this last year following our anniversary week. Our funds were pretty tight, and we had funneled most of our free financial resources at the time into a few day’s at Riverbend Retreat for a celebration of our anniversary some much needed time alone together.
With our budget tight, there was little left for presents. This would not be as years past when I had better jobs, such as when I took her on a cruise (25th anniversary) nor would I be presenting her with really jewelry. There simply was no money for such luxuries. So I had to be more creative; I made them. I scroll sawed and assembled two boxes (using Birdseye Maple and Butternut) and a set of Heart-shaped Walnut shelves. One of the boxes was oval with a fretwork lid and the other Heart Shaped with fretwork and “Be Mine” scrolled across it’s front. These must have been pretty good, as they were both featured in Scroll Saw Woodworking and Gifts Magazine, Holiday 2011 issue, page 16! So if you are a woodworker or craft person, try making something special for your valentine, or have a custom item created for her.
Photo’s MWH – Heart Shaped Fretwork “Be Mine” Valentine Box cut in Birdseye Maple with Butternut sides; Fretwork Oval Box also cut in Birdseye and Butternut featuring magnetic lid and brass handles. These were featured in the Holiday 2011 issue of ScrollSaw Woodworking and Crafts Holiday 2011 magazine, page 16. Designs by Steve Good, The ScrollSaw Workshop.
The funny part of this story was that I had not been aware that these boxes had made it into the magazine. So there I was during Christmas season in Home Depot thumbing through the pages of several woodworking magazines, and there they were!
If you are not handy with wood, try this idea. Go to the bookstore (like Half-Price Books) and buy one of those blank journals. Buy a nice one! Research on Google, Yahoo, smart phone apps and the old fashioned thing called a library, and find poems and literature that expresses how you feel toward your wife. Hand write these out, page after page, for your wife. If you want to add a special touch, add some wax seals to special pages you want to highlight (I bought mine from Micheal’s). Again, this takes some degree of effort but will be cherished by your wife!
In these hard economic times, one can put as much if not more love into items hand created and not skimp on anniversaries and Valentines presents. And by creating your gifts, they can become family heirlooms attesting to a love between you and your wife for future generations. Go ahead, try it men!
Filed under: Covenant Marriage and Sex